So, Miss Madison, almost two weeks ago your mom dropped the bomb (well, that is what it felt like in my heart when it exploded from the pain) that she got into grad school (don't get me wrong, that is awesome). The not so awesome part for your Grammy (and Uncle Tyler and your Pop-Pop) is that you will be moving away.

My heart was so broken and I have a million and one questions about how all of this will work out for your mommy with a baby and you, your daddy potentially living down here, or wherever the Army sends him (if they ever quit dragging their feet and he leaves any time soon), and what happens with your sister. The devil is doing his utmost to make me so very sad and filled with so many mixed emotions.

While my heart knows that God has it all in control, I just can't imagine what I will ever do not being able to see you and your siblings for the next two years as much as I have so far. I am sooooo worried, and that is not from God, because His word says to not worry. Seems I am fighting it on a regular basis, however.

So in the interim I am holding on to memories, spending as much time with you as I can, and taking lots of pictures.
I am sure I will cry a river the weekend you finally move up to the mountains for good (well, the next two years, at least). I just can't bear the thought, but Pop-Pop assures me we will be able to visit, and when I am "off" (though work is not certain at all at this point) that I will be allowed to come up and visit, and your mommy keeps telling me she will be home often, though I have my doubts. See, that old devil is at it again!!

Your mommy got a new job so maybe I will see you more in the next few months, which should make me feel better, but I know it will just make your leaving me even more difficult. :(

We have done some fun things in the past few weeks- museum, playground trips, the zoo with your mommy and Uncle Tyler, and today, as a matter of fact, we went to Pullen Park with your sister, mommy, and Aaden. Finally the rain stopped enough to enjoy a day of beautiful sunshine. Yes, I took quite a few pictures. :) I can only hope we have more to come in the next few months.

So, if my posts over the next few months are mildly depressing...lol...you can understand why. :) I love you so much that I just don't know how I will keep my mind focused on other things while you are away from me. I have a few "projects" I want to accomplish, and of course your brother will be here for only a short while before you go up Ithere, but I can only hope your mommy is true to her word and comes home often.

As for your daddy, I know he is still uncertain where all this puts him- other than driving up and down the mountain, so it appears. It seems the military is a hurry up -and- wait sort of thing. The longer they drag along, the less likely he will even get to be here to see his son born, if they keep it up at this rate. Then there is all the training time, etc. I just would feel a whole lot better if he were with you, your brother, and you mommy while you are away. :(

Saturday is a big day for your mommy- she is graduating. Though you have no concept of that- let's just say ---- after all your mommy has overcome in the past 2.5 years--- it is a VERY big deal!!! So we will all be trucking over to Raleigh on Saturday late afternoon to celebrate this big event in your mommy's life. Your mommy has a lot of goals she wants to reach, and I know she will do her utmost to accomplish them.

Closing for now. Love you bunches.

~Grammy